I’ve been trying—unsuccessfully—to get Naomi Limor Sedek, president and CEO of the Tidewater Jewish Foundation, to listen to this song for weeks now. Man Smart, Woman Smarter, by Grateful Dead, has always made me smile, not just because of its catchy tune, but because it so perfectly reflects the dynamic of my life. I’ve been fortunate to be surrounded by brilliant, funny, fiercely loving women who have shaped me in ways I can only begin to explain. And truthfully, they’ve made me smarter—whether I liked it or not.
It started with my mother, Florence Kramer, who had more talents than I could ever list. She gave me my love of gardening, my competitive streak, and a can-do attitude that refuses to back down. One of my favorite memories of her happened at one of my brother Jeff’s wrestling matches. It wasn’t going well—so badly, in fact, that she could barely watch. But when two men nearby started yelling “kill him!” in reference to Jeff’s opponent, she sprang into action. All five feet, two inches and 120 pounds of her marched straight up to them, pointed her finger in their faces, and said, “Mister, that’s my son you’re telling him to kill!” They didn’t say another word for the rest of the meet. That was my mom—sharp, courageous, and unwavering when it came to defending her family.
My wife, Anne, on the other hand, takes a slightly different approach. Through the years, she has been my most enduring source of grace and wisdom. Her patience grounds me. Her sense of humor matches mine, which keeps us laughing—even when the going gets tough. But what really sets her apart is her quiet intelligence. I’ve always joked that she never says anything unless she knows she’s absolutely right. In 45 years of marriage, I’ve maybe won five arguments—and none of those were even worth winning. These days, before I make a questionable decision or say something debatable, I run it by her. And if I have to ask? My kids will be the first to tell me I already know the answer.
This brings me to my daughter, Carra, who is every bit as fierce and brilliant as my mom. She works harder than anyone I know. By age 12, she had already outpaced me intellectually. I remember a friend once confiding in us, concerned that her newly graduated son still didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life. I tried to reassure her, saying, “At 42, I’m not sure I know what I want to do either.” And, without missing a beat, my daughter chimed in, “Then why do I have to listen to you?” Thank goodness wisdom usually trumps intelligence, because I looked her straight in the eye and said, “Because your mom said so.”
Through it all, we’ve navigated life with humor, love, and a shared belief in the importance of community. These women have inspired me to grow, to serve, and to lead by example.
As chair of the Tidewater Jewish Foundation, I carry their influence with me every day. The strength, clarity, and conviction they bring to our family have helped shape my values and how I approach leadership. They’ve taught me that legacy isn’t just about what you leave behind—it’s about how you live, how you lift others up, and how you use your voice to build a stronger, more secure community for the next generation. Their impact is woven into the initiatives we support at TJF and into the very fabric of the Jewish future we’re working together to sustain for my children, your children, their children, and beyond.
“Man Smart, Woman Smarter”: The witty influence of a mom, wife, and daughter
