Merle S. Becker

Princeton, NJ – Merle Louise Skoler Becker, 91, of Princeton, died on August 20, 2026, at Princeton Medical Center following a brief illness.

Merle was born on June 6, 1935, in New York City to Sam Skoler, an accountant, and Dorothy Fraiman, a homemaker. Merle’s mother Dorothy was an arts enthusiast who, despite a modest household budget, took both Merle and her younger sister Cara to a wide array of musical and theatrical performances. From a young age Merle showed an aptitude for music, giving her first piano recital at age five. She quickly became a skilled cello player as well; and one of her fondest memories was attending music camp at Interlochen Center of the Arts where she made lifelong friends. After graduating from what is now known as the LaGuardia High School of Music & Arts and Performing Arts, Merle continued her musical studies at Barnard College, earning a bachelor’s degree. She later completed a master’s degree in music education at Smith College. While working as a music teacher in New York City, she was set up on a blind date with Dr. William Becker, a dentist from Norfolk, Va. who had also grown up in New York City. On their first date, Merle famously played a piano duet with her sister Cara in the parlor to entertain him.

Merle and Bill were married in 1959 and began to raise their family in Norfolk. A diehard New Yorker, Merle steadfastly maintained her N.Y. driver’s license, holding out the slender hope that she and Bill would return to the city of their birth. Eventually, she embraced life in Norfolk, playing cello in the Virginia Symphony and participating in the local Jewish community. Every summer she drove her sons to the Catskills so they could spend several weeks with her parents and Cara’s family.

While raising her boys Merle gave music lessons to neighborhood children and later became a music teacher at Norfolk Academy. Over time she transformed the school’s music department from a single room with a piano into an extremely popular, multidisciplinary program that included orchestra, choir, theater, and dance. In a sense, Merle brought NYC to NA. She ultimately served as chair of the Fine Arts Department for several years and mentored many students who went on to pursue careers in the arts.

After retiring from teaching, Merle continued to play cello in a chamber music quartet and assisted Bill in managing his dental practice. She also spent as much time as possible in New York City seeing shows and exhibits with her cherished sister Cara, whose daughters Margot and Sabrina she dearly loved. Always a loving and attentive mother, Merle kept in constant contact with her four adult sons, supporting and encouraging them through every stage of life. When speaking with Merle on the phone, it was not unusual to hear her exclaim, “I got the beep!” when one of the other family members called at the same time. As the grandchildren arrived, Merle showered them with love, gifts, and time–including trips to the beach, pool, museums, aquarium, even the Metropolitan Opera. Cheerful, energetic, and patient, she was an amazing grandmother.

When Merle and Bill began to find it challenging to live in Virginia far from their sons, they moved to Princeton. Merle accepted aging, relocation, health issues, and the loss of her husband Bill with tremendous grace and dignity. In recent years she enjoyed frequent visits from her children and grandchildren and developed new friendships with her fellow residents at 55 Witherspoon Street and other devotees of the Princeton Public Library. She never lost her passion for music and played her childhood cello until both she and the instrument became too fragile. Even in her last year she delighted in attending musical performances at the library, Hinds Plaza, the McCarter, and Richardson Auditorium.

Merle was predeceased by her beloved husband Bill (2018). She is survived by her four sons: Richard (Rachel), Paul (Lori), Daniel (Madeleine), Sam (Jennifer); grandchildren Olivia, Ben, Hannah, Joshua, Sophia, Corey, Robbie, Emily, and Kate; nieces Margot, Sabrina, Dana, Jodi, and Randi; and many friends.

A funeral service was held at Mather-Hodge Funeral Home in Princeton. To honor Merle’s lifelong passion for the arts and education, donations may be made to the McCarter Theatre Center in Princeton, N.J. or the Princeton Public Library.